My son is on the waiting list for a treatment center within our catchment area. He has been promised a bed within the 5-15 business days. Possibly sooner. The catch is that he has to be drug free when they call him to come in. I'm really not sure he is going to make it. I pray that he will.
He asked me last night if he could go out. I reminded him that our agreement was that he would not leave or have company but that I wasn't a prison warden and if wanted to leave he was welcomed to. He would need to take all of his stuff with him and he would not be allowed to come back and that he could handle getting into treatment on his own. I also told him that he would be responsible for paying the $$$ that they are asking for up front. As my grandad would say, "Boy Howdy!" he didn't like that response at all.
So, you all know what happened for the next several minutes. He became a raging bull. Snorting and stomping. I invited him to leave again and told him that he didn't have to go through all of this because I wasn't going to stop him if he wanted to leave but that he would not be allowed back in the house if he broke our agreement. He stomped back to the room he is sleeping in and calmed down.
Another condition was that he was to have no access to a phone. We don't have a land line anymore. Everyone has a cell phone including my son. When he went to detox he removed the SIM card from his phone and he told me he threw it away. Guess what? He lied! I am shocked! Shocked I tell you! (eye roll inserted here). I woke up last night, as I tend to do when he is in the house, and made sure the doors were all locked. He was outside on the phone. I told him to come inside because I want the doors locked when I am in bed and then I went on-line and deactivated his phone which I should have done a long time ago.
I know that the veteran's of dealing with an addicted child would say that he really should not be in my house at all. I agree, he shouldn't. I am ready for him not to be. We feel like we need to give him this shot since he initiated treatment in the beginning and it is not his fault that he picked the wrong facility. I know that I can't keep him sober. He may have already used as far as I know. The consequence of that will be he won't get into the next place and we will be forced to drop him off at a shelter and drive away.
I am praying that he gets the call sooner than later. For all of our sakes.
I hope he hangs in there and you are doing a great job of keeping your cool. In regards to your previous posts, I agree about how difficult it was to get my son treatment because he does not have insurance. We were lucky because they had a special program there for Natives and that is how my son got in so fast. Anyway, there were quite a few mornings that I was in the waiting room and would watch addicts come in and get turned away and told there was a 9 month waiting list. One young man walked in I would say around 22 and was begging them to let him in he wanted to Detox and had been doing it on his own for several days. He was crying and they told him he could put his name on a waiting list. He could barely stand, I do not know how he walked in there by himself. He told her he didn't need to be on a waiting list because there was no way he would make it through this and turned around and walked out. He had some shirts rolled up he was carrying and I imagine that was all he owned. I cried all the way home. I felt so lucky and grateful for my son that he was in there, I hope one day my son realizes how fortunate HE was.
ReplyDeleteTori,
ReplyDeleteThanks so much. My son has been keeping a very low profile for the last couple of days. I know he is depressed and anxious about what will happend next. I am so happy that your son is doing well. Hopefully one day he will realize how fortunate he IS and was.