This quote rings very true to me in so many ways today. I think I need to slow down and re-think how I want to play the cards that have been dealt to me. I can either fold and continue the same ole way or be more deliberate in my decision making in deciding which cards to let go of. Hmmm!
yaya really said some important things to me today. I really need to do some soul searching and decide how I want to live the rest of my life knowing that my son is an addict and will always be an addict. How can I begin to undo MY patterns of behavior and start living a healthier life for myself. Is it safer for me jump from the moving crazy train that I am on or continue to ride it knowing that eventually it will de-rail?
I think I know those answers for myself. Accepting that they are correct might be harder to get to.
It's hard to accept and to let go. But it is the only SANE thing to do, believe me. Don't relent. It is your health and sanity that is at risk. There is life after the addiction, at least for us. I have done it, even though it was by far the hardest thing I have ever done. I have detached with love, it's been 3 years. I love my daughter from afar. I miss out on her life and the life of my 2 grandkids. But I retained my sanity and have found serenity. It is possible.
ReplyDeleteBristolvol, thank you for the comments on my recent breakdown! All are much appreciated. I am learning boundries...not an easy job, not a fun job but I am getting there.
ReplyDeleteTerri, it's all about self-presevation. Our addicts can run us in the ground and we don't even realize until we hit rock bottom. I mean our wallet, health, sanity, marriage, relationships, etc. All the things that are dear to us take a bath if we allow it and some of them will drown, all thanks to one person (the addict) who takes center stage as often as we will allow it. I am glad I can help you out a little. I know how painful it is, I have been there.
ReplyDeleteI agree - the accepting is a bitch.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I think that it would help if I had more of a life to get back to, like another kid, a grand kid, a boyfriend, a LIFE. For various reasons I don't have much of one at the moment and its NOT because of Keven.
I hope you are feeling better this afternoon. Great quote you shared. Its getting it from the head to the heart that's difficult. Randy P. was a great man to share his wisdom with the world.