When my son left the state last February he had a order to appear in court on a paraphernalia charge. Now he has a warrant out for failure to appear. I also know of an unpaid ticket for driving without a seat belt. There may be others that I know nothing about.
He is living with my parents right now. They helped him get an a vehicle to drive, which they cannot really afford to do, and took him today to see about getting the car insured. Guess what? His license has been suspended and he can't get insurance.
He called me this morning with an almost accusatory tone toward me. I told him that I know nothing about his license being suspended and that it could have something to do with the warrant for his arrest and the drug charge. I gently reminded him that the charges are not going to go away. He said, "Why do you want me to go to jail?" CLICK!!!! After he hung up on me I turned my phone off. I don't want to deal with his hysterics today.
He is supposed to start a new job tomorrow and now if he keeps it he will have to depend on my parents to get him to and from work. Which will mean that one of them will have to drive two 60 mile round trips a day to get him to and from work. This will be a major inconvenience for them not to mention the economic hardship.
I wish that things would work out for him and I find myself wishing that he could catch a break. Then I remind myself that unless his takes care of the mess he left behind in the wake of his addiction he will never get that break.
I knew an older lady when I was growing up who repeated these words from the bible, "We reap what we sow". My son is hopfully learning something from all this. I know that he wants me to fix it. That is what he expects me to do. I can't, I don't want to, it wouldn't be fair to him for me to get involved. He needs to plant something positive for a change. He needs to step up and face the consequences for his past behavior. That is the only way he can leave it behind for good.
Can't plant something in crappy soil and expect it to grow.
ReplyDeleteWhen Alex got serious he recognized that he had some "messes" his word not mine, to clean up and he began systematically going to court. Unfortunately it involved 4 different counties but eventually they all got their turn at him. I wrote about it on my blog back in 2010.
Your son's messes are his. If he is serious he has to face up to what he wrought and in my words, "MAN UP".
Ron