I think that went well.....

I broke down and answered the phone when my son called yesterday. He called my cell and I ignored it, then he called my office phone and I ignored it, then he called my cell again before I could turn it off. He hung up on me one time when I didn't say what he wanted to hear. I broke my rule and answered when he called back. I usually don't answer after he hangs up. I basically laid out my boundaries. No visits at my house until I know he is seeking sobriety. He needs a long term residential treatment center but if he would attempt meetings, counseling, anything I would consider letting him visit if he is sober at the time. I told him if he showed up at my house high he would not be allowed in. If he pushed the issue I will have him arrested and then I will file a retraining order. He tried to turn things around and make them my fault and I didn't let him. I let him know that he made this mess and only he could make it better and that I refused to take the blame or responsibility for any of it. I only allowed conversation about our relationship. Nothing about the baby. I told him that I am  not responsible for scheduling visits or making it possible for him visit. That is up to him and the baby's mom.

At the end of the conversation he asked if we were going to speak to each other on the phone. I said that it would be on my terms. He can call but if I can't or don't want to speak with him I won't answer. I admitted that there are times when I don't feel strong enough to speak with him and on those times I will not answer the phone. He said he was sorry for making me feel that way.  I told him that I love him but that I needed to end the conversation. He said he loved me too.

Peace to us all tonight.